Two.

I would be unfair to say that Mr Twat is without his benefits (although most of them he probably gets from the council...) He does have his good sides. Because he never wastes his breath on whispering romantic words in your ear, or sweet texts or emails, you know that when he actually does say something, he really means it. So when you had a really hard day at work, and you come home to a tip and you stop and sigh for a minute before you start cleaning up, he will look up from the telly and tell you that it is okay, you can cook dinner before you start cleaning - then you know Mr Twat really, really loves you.